ONE IN THREE teanage girls have been sexually abused.

A shocking new survey, released today, reads that ONE in THREE teanage girls, between the ages of 13 to 17, say they have been sexually abused by their boyfriends.
The NSPCC are taking these claims very seriously. It's the most in depth survey carried out in recent times, that shows up the way young girls are being treated, by their boyfriends.

My thoughts when I heard it was, why are we not teaching our sons to respect women!!

This topic I cannot deal with. A penis should not be used as a weapon or power toy.

letitbe wrote:This topic I cannot deal with. A penis should not be used as a weapon or power toy.

Hiya Lets, :wavingsmily:

This survey ranged from minor to major sexual abuse. Some girls felt threatened or intimidated if the boy or man touched them where they did,nt want to be touched. Or mithered them to go "to far".
The outcome was that they felt threatened or pushed, into doing something they was'nt ready to do.
Some were actually raped.
One in Three is a VERY high figure.

Syl, you`re picking one side of the survey. ( like someone else always does on Forums. :wdeucnd: )
The survey also stated ONE in FIVE BOYS suffered violence in a relationship. One in SEVENTEEN BOYS reported being pressured into sexual activity !!!!!! .
Its not just a masculine thing.

Why have you got a shining sun when your name is mentioned, (I want one of those???)

Just the usual man-hating thread from good old syl......

Syl wrote:

letitbe wrote:This topic I cannot deal with. A penis should not be used as a weapon or power toy.

Hiya Lets, :wavingsmily:

This survey ranged from minor to major sexual abuse. Some girls felt threatened or intimidated if the boy or man touched them where they did,nt want to be touched. Or mithered them to go "to far".
The outcome was that they felt threatened or pushed, into doing something they was'nt ready to do.
Some were actually raped.
One in Three is a VERY high figure.

Does this survey give way to the victim culture?

and what is it actually classing as sexual abuse...

I have had boyfriends before who have touched me where I didnt want to be touched, or have tried to mither me to go further then I wanted. I would never say I was sexually abused by them though.

Dean wrote:Just the usual man-hating thread from good old syl......

I dont hate men, just tossers.

Snookerballs wrote:Syl, you`re picking one side of the survey. ( like someone else always does on Forums. :wdeucnd: )
The survey also stated ONE in FIVE BOYS suffered violence in a relationship. One in SEVENTEEN BOYS reported being pressured into sexual activity !!!!!! .
Its not just a masculine thing.

Why have you got a shining sun when your name is mentioned, (I want one of those???)

Because I am a smiley sunshine to almost everyone who knows me. Syl.

I have picked up on the female side of it, true.
I did,nt read the article, I was listening to the discussion on the local BBC radio channel this morning, and they concentrated on the girls who had been abused.
Is it the same survey that has mentioned one in five boys?

I have a son, I would have hated him to be abused, or abuse anyone else, so yes, even though the figure is much less, its still very worrying that such a high level of violence is shown, in young relationships.

http://news.scotsman.com/latestnews/Survey-finds-third-of-girls.5604112.jp

Just found some reading .

Turkeygirl wrote:

Syl wrote:

letitbe wrote:This topic I cannot deal with. A penis should not be used as a weapon or power toy.

Hiya Lets, :wavingsmily:

This survey ranged from minor to major sexual abuse. Some girls felt threatened or intimidated if the boy or man touched them where they did,nt want to be touched. Or mithered them to go "to far".
The outcome was that they felt threatened or pushed, into doing something they was'nt ready to do.
Some were actually raped.
One in Three is a VERY high figure.

Does this survey give way to the victim culture?

and what is it actually classing as sexual abuse...

I have had boyfriends before who have touched me where I didnt want to be touched, or have tried to mither me to go further then I wanted. I would never say I was sexually abused by them though.

You raised the same questions as the interviewer did.

Are people so aware of a pc culture nowerdays, they would class a boy making a pass, or even having a crafty grope, as sexual abuse? Someone of a generation older, would treat that as part and parcel of "dating" and deal with it.
A spokesman from the NSPCC, did'nt think that was the case.

The abuse did range from being coerced or bullied into having sex, to actual violence and rape.

I would hazard a guess that although the figure for boys being abused is lower,(surprisingly not a great difference) it could be due to the situation that boys are unlikely to admit to being violated by a girl, whereas a girl is more likely to feel guilty in the event of "heavy petting" and construe this as "sexual abuse" but that dosent make interesting media headlines.

Id sure like to see the questions and answers.
the figure of one in three seems a little too sensational to believe.

The figures are shocking.

Chronos, I think it was Jodi said it on the other forum, the figures in America are 1 in 4. Not a great difference really.

Snookerballs, The figures for young boys being SEXUALLY abused, is 1 in 17. Physically abused 1 in 5. That could also include gay relationships as well though, could'nt it?.

Youngsters live an instant gratification kind of life now - from gadgets and money, to sexual satisfaction. It's all about 'me' and imo the unwritten rules and self control has gone out of young people.

Tytonidae wrote:Youngsters live an instant gratification kind of life now - from gadgets and money, to sexual satisfaction. It's all about 'me' and imo the unwritten rules and self control has gone out of young people.

It does boil down to self control, Ty, you are right.

But why are'nt parents teaching their kids to respect others? Why are boys sexually abusing girls as young as 13?
Why are girls allowing it to happen. They should be taught self worth, as well as self control, should,nt they?

I am sure there has always been the odd case of a young person being used and abused by her boyfriend, (and vice versa) but one in three is hard to grasp.

I heard this story on the radio S yl and couldn't believe how high the figure was. As has been stated though, it takes into account all sorts and I wonder how the questions were posed but still...

Lot's of things I'd like to know about this like, who was asked, from what backgrounds, what was asked etc. I believe though, that at least part of this problem is down to a level in society that do not teach anything valuable to their children, boys and girls. Commonly known as 'dragged up' by parents who were 'dragged up'.

I think it was Chronos who wondered what questions they were asked, to reach this figure. It would be interesting to know.

I should think most women can recall at least one incident that could maybe be described as some sort of "abuse" depending on how "sensitive" a person is.

For eg.....I have been "flashed at" by exposed men, several times, in my youth. The first time was pretty scary, I was young and on my own. The other times were laughable. It had no effect on me though.
I have heard other women say that they have never gotten over something like that. It has traumatised them for life.

A daft example, but people do see things from different angles.

I wonder if they will release the questions to this survey.

Hello Syl, did they classify what constituted 'sexual abuse' in the survey? I am curious as to what all it covers?

Tuscany wrote:Hello Syl, did they classify what constituted 'sexual abuse' in the survey? I am curious as to what all it covers?

Hi, :wavingsmily: From what I have read and heard, it varied from being forced or pressured to do things they did'nt want to, to violence and rape.
Violence and rape is cut and dried, "forced or pressured" is a bit more vague.

Syl wrote:

Tuscany wrote:Hello Syl, did they classify what constituted 'sexual abuse' in the survey? I am curious as to what all it covers?

Hi, :wavingsmily: From what I have read and heard, it varied from being forced or pressured to do things they did'nt want to, to violence and rape.
Violence and rape is cut and dried, "forced or pressured" is a bit more vague.

I am sure I typed your name there, not put a smiley instead

That is a shockingly high number then, even if "force and pressured" is vague, it still indicates it was against their will.

I know, its a horrible thought to think so many young people have been open to abuse.
The figure in America, according to their own survey, is 1 in 4 girls..not much different.

That was the point the NSPCC were saying. As you said, if its against someones will, it IS sexual abuse.

Tuscany, type S yl. or syl, (small s) then you wont get the Syl.
I get confused myself.

Syl wrote:I know, its a horrible thought to think so many young people have been open to abuse.
The figure in America, according to their own survey, is 1 in 4 girls..not much different.

That was the point the NSPCC were saying. As you said, if its against someones will, it IS sexual abuse.

Tuscany, type S yl. or syl, (small s) then you wont get the Syl.
I get confused myself.

It cannot really be a problem with the survey questions then, if it spans 2 continents. Controversial question to ask I know, but I wonder if the earlier and earlier start of a sex life amongst teenagers is one of the reasons. And boys not being taught by their parents, that no means NO, whatever the situation.

Testing, testing... syl

Two different Continents, two different surveys, but very similar results.

I think you have a point. Early sexual relations create problems.
Boys are'nt tought to respect girls, or to apply self control.
Girls are'nt tought to respect themselves,.. and apply self control.
And very few it seems, feel the need to wait till they are old enought to cope with sexual relations, and everything it entails.

Family breakdown, lack of education, loss of innocence = problems.

Blimey, I had never even been KISSED when I was 15, never mind sex at 13.

Syl wrote:Two different Continents, two different surveys, but very similar results.

I think you have a point. Early sexual relations create problems.
Boys are'nt tought to respect girls, or to apply self control.
Girls are'nt tought to respect themselves,.. and apply self control.
And very few it seems, feel the need to wait till they are old enought to cope with sexual relations, and everything it entails.

Family breakdown, lack of education, loss of innocence = problems.

Blimey, I had never even been KISSED when I was 15, never mind sex at 13.

Exactly. Self control is not a word that is used much anymore, it's all about doing it all, wanting it all, having it all - NOW, the consequences be damned.

I hope someone puts up some of the questions asked on that survery, it would be interesting to talk about it.

Ive been pressured into sex before but I would never say that that was "abuse"
I want to see the survey for myself

chronos wrote:Ive been pressured into sex before but I would never say that that was "abuse"
I want to see the survey for myself

Interesting! Without getting into details, could you tell us what it was that made you feel pressured, Chronos?